Thursday, October 27, 2011

Why Facebook is destroying America (and the world)

So why is Facebook destroying everything we know and love?

One word: Accountability.

The biggest issue with Facebook is that no one is accountable for their actions on this blessed/cursed social networking site. People can just post, comment, link, like, tag, etc., etc., etc. whatever they want at any time they want, wherever they want to. And seldom are there repercussions for those actions.

I suppose if a dude posts that he got totally wasted last night, he might not nail that job interview the next day, or if the girl posts provocative photos, her father might ground her. That stuff is obvious. But what about the more seemingly trivial posts and comments. The ones that seem harmless. Who's watching out for those? No one. Absolutely no one.

What posts I'm talking about, you ask? Here's a list for you:

1) Any posts from someone who has seven more posts for the day. No one is that interesting. Please stop.
2) The dude who posts full chapters of the Bible. How about you just tell us the reference and we'll look it up ourselves.
3) The girl whose only posts are song lyrics. If you can't think of anything to say, log off.
4) The girl who comments on every post of every single friend she has, every day. You're trying way too hard and no one likes you.
5) The person who posts 50 pictures from the downtown drinking fest they were at last night. If there's anything more unattractive than you, it's you when you're drunk.
6) The person who comments on photos or posts from years ago. No one else wants to reminisce. You just brought up a time we probably all want to forget.
7) Girls whose only photos of themselves are with the "duckface." It is rarely, if ever, attractive. Just smile. You'll be surprised at how gorgeous girls can be if they would just smile.
7b) Guys who do the duckface. You need to be taken out back and shot
8) People who use Facebook to constantly gripe about every issue they have. If your grandmother is in the hospital, then yes, you can let us know. If you're fighting with your 7th boyfriend in the last 3 months, we could care less.
9) Disastrously bad spelling. You most likely have a full keyboard in front of you and some form of spellcheck. Type like someone who spent at least one day in school.

And my favorite...

10) People who put hashtags in their posts. I'll make this very simple for you people. HASHTAGS ARE FOR TWITTER. They don't work in Facebook (if you even know what they're for). So you can stop.

My last issue is for those that can say that they don't do any of the above, yet do something just as wrong. A wise man once said, "All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." I'm calling out all you enablers out there. The ones that comment and applaud these wrongdoers, telling them that it's ok to use Facebook in such a delinquent way. It is the friends of these misusers of Facebook that have an obligation of holding them to a higher standard.

So to answer the question, who's holding these people accountable?

We all should.

FEEDBACK: Do you have another issue with how people use Facebook? Please share below!

4 comments:

  1. Feedback? No. Confession? Yes. I've posed several times with a duck face. Have hope been known to comment on pics 2 years or older (may have done it tonight). I've been known to pose provactively while apple picking. Drunk pictures? Maybe not been drunk, but definitely look it. So I ask you people? Who's going to hold this gal accountable, while I continually call out people out on the other issues Greg has stated?

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  3. I like posting song lyrics..so sorry scorn me for doing so.. I'm a lyrical person, and I feel lyrics can sometimes say what i'm thinking or what I am trying to convey to others... Just saying.

    ..But i'm with you on all the other ones you listed!

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  4. Ashley if you read what Greg wrote he said the girls that only post song lyrics. Greg has been known himself to post one or two statuses referencing epic lyrics, as have I. He's referencing the plague that is those artsy fartsy, emo, I'm trying to express myself through song kind of girls. They post lyrics like "it was the moonlight, the contemplations of melodies that your heart beat sang to me in my mind, that reminds me of us". I'm pretty sure it only means something to those girls , because they're the least creative dolts out there. I mean first off, they have to copy lyrics for their status which means originality is absent, and second i'm pretty sure 9 times out of 10, the lyrics don't even make sense. So next time you ask youself should I post these taylor swift lyrics? The answer is yes. It can only be better than SlitMyWrists mcgee posting lyrics from death at dawn. (Clause: no one commited suicide by reading aforementioned false lyrics by said false band name)

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