yeah, yeah, yeah, we get it. Jesus made the mountains. Go figure.

I'm easily entertained by the people who gush on and on about nature and how God created it. They'll see a sunset or a mountain range or a butterfly and post on facebook how wonderful God is and how after seeing that, they just had to get on their knees and as the tears stream down their face, they thank the good Lord for all His blessings. And these people I'm talking about? They're men.

So let's set the record straight. God rocks. He dominates the whole creativity thing. He definitely made everything and He did with style. It's amazing how intricate everything is.

But guys, MAN UP. For crying out loud, act like a dude. Sometimes I feel like I'm surrounded by Brendan Frasers from Bedazzled. Trust me, it's quite possible for a man to give God glory for everything he's done without sounding like a wimp. Do you think Joshua was killing all those bad guys while looking at the pretty rainbow? No! But did he make altars to God after victories? Yes!

The only person who can get away with it is David (one word: harp). But that's because he took down a dude twice as big as him with a rock. When you do that, you can cry all you want.

So wipe those tears from your eyes, stop hugging me, and thank God without sounding like a pansy.

Amen.